You are right now forgiven.
Yes right now, and even before you were conceived, you were forgiven of every self-willed act to either try to be like God or side with the evil one and openly tell lies about God. How humbling to know, before you did any single self-willed act, it was given to Christ and He took care of it. With a conscience cleared of fear, guilt, and shame, you have both the right and privilege to forgive yourself, others, and even God if you think you need to. This forgiveness has been given to all. It cannot be purchased or bettered. As a loving Father, God leans down from His easy chair and wipes away all your tears. If your heart is broken, He heals it. If you just don't like the life you are living, He gives you a new LIFE, one so big it can live you. NO! It is living you. For it is He in you who both stirs your will to want and gives the thing your heart wants. What does your heart want? You know, at the bottom of your redeemed heart you know. You want God. (Philippians 2:13, Psalm 37:4)